Sure, you can write a great deck, but are you a good listener?

Every job description I’ve written or responded to includes some variation of “excellent communication skills” as a requirement. Often the job description goes on to elaborate on the written and oral communication demands of the position – writing decks, giving presentations... These requirements are always about outward communication, never about receiving communication. “Excellent listener” is rarely, if ever a requirement.

As I’ve mentored talent and helped teams and organizations work more effectively, I’ve realized how one-sided most people (and organizations) view business communications.  I’ve had a few sessions lately where I’ve been working with my clients on how to best receive communication, and thinking a lot about how I can do a better job of this myself.

I’m working to make the following list a part of my daily interactions:

  • Focus on the person who’s talking: look at the presenter or their materials. Listen to the speaker on the conference call. This sounds obvious, but in practice most of us are looking at our phones or computers most of the time.

  • Work sequentially when possible: yes, you can probably get more tasks checked off your list if you multi-task, but you’ll get more out of each task and likely do a better job if you do them one at a time. It may take you a bit longer to get through your list, but both your output and what you get out of each task will improve if you focus on one task at a time.

  • Limit distractions: clear your desktop, both physical and virtual. When you’re reading emails, close the other windows on your screen. When you’re on a conference call, close your browser and IM client. When you’re in a meeting, only use your computer for taking notes, not cleaning out your inbox.

  • Read between the lines: think about how the speaker or sender chose and delivered their words. Did they seem rushed? Angry? In need of advice? Helpful? Consider their implied state as you reply, and think how you can improve the conversation and provide what they need.

  • Ask clarifying or validating questions: if you’re not sure you understand the concepts of a presentation or requirements or a request, ask for more details before proceeding. This will ensure you’re receiving the information as it was intended.

  • Take time to process: whenever possible take a moment to re-read an email before replying to make sure you understand both the explicit and implicit communication. Think about what is really being said before rushing to reply. Take a few minutes at the end of a big meeting to summarize what was discussed and clarify next steps. This slowing down will generally reduce misunderstandings and minimize back-and-forth, and can bring conversations to resolution faster than charging ahead without processing time.

I don’t always succeed at following these guidelines (I have a HUGE problem with #2 and #3), but I’m working on improving, and find that this kind of focus helps me get more out of interactions, enabling me to contribute what’s truly needed, not what I assume is needed, which is really the aim of excellent communication. 

Previous
Previous

Reading recommendation: Better than Before.

Next
Next

Take a walk in my shoes.